becoming

the trail of a family becoming

報名

另外一個在教會的奇怪現象是我們不太喜歡報名。可能你覺得主日學,報不報名有甚麼緊要?或者容我向各位解釋解釋…

  1. 報名的主要原因是老師要知道報讀的人數。教十個人的小組和教三十五人是很不同的。通常,超過二十人的課程,差不多可以肯定課程的形式只可以是講授,即是「我講—你聽」那種。若要求討論、分享,或者一半學員還未有機會,我們已經要落堂了。換然之,任何別的教學設計都是「晒氣」。所以,不論老師多用心設計課程,就算在報名表上只有十個名字,若開課時,突然走進十多人來,你說老師可以怎麼辦?
  2. 報名另一原因是老師需要先明白學員的情況和程度。不錯,我們分了初、中、高班。但就算你老人家是高班程度卻要走去初班,至少都報個名好嗎?等老師有個預算可以嗎?到時你大喊太淺、另外的學員卻又喊著太深,兩敗俱傷,何苦?
  3. 報名也是為了場地:以今季為例,我粗略估計最少上課的五份之一人沒有報名。那我們可以怎樣辦呢?Okay,一味靠估。過去黃牧師所教的課程多人上,現在報名也差不多二十人,另外兩班在名單上卻十人也不夠。那我只可以:
    1. 向沒有報名的(甚至已經報名的)作出呼籲,看看他們會否願意調班,以平衡各班情況,希望開學的時候再加入未報名的人也不會出現一面倒的情況。
    2. 照估計作出班房的安排。二十人那班要大房,十人不夠的在小房。
    3. 但出乎意了之外,今天,十多個沒有報名的人在上課前一秒走入其中十人不夠的那班;相反二十人那班,沒有新人show up,而且有些報了名的又no show。你話可以點?下星期,轉房!
    4. 再者,你想想這是否對那些報了名但經我「呼籲」的弟兄姊妹很不公平?現在可以說,若你報名,有機會不能上自己的「第一志願」;相反,若不報名,卻可以到時話去邊就去邊,無王管!你說是否很荒謬?

弟兄姊妹,還是那一句,

不是一個人的

請體諒別人。可以嗎? 

不是一個人的。

我想分享一個情況,但我希望各位不要以為我是針對自身的處境。

這其實是我想說很久的情況了,我想說:

我們事奉不是一個人的事,而是真的相互牽連;這甚至是對事奉的感受來說也是真的。

讓我拿作聚會司琴做一個例子。

舉例說:你是某教會聚會的司琴。假若作領詩的連他/她要選甚麼詩唱也要開始聚會時才告訴你,那你以為你的感受是甚麼?呀,或者你不懂彈琴;那不要緊,不如幻想你是新聞報導員。假若每天每次作新聞報導的之前,你手上都永遠不會拿到新聞稿—我的意思不是說那些突發的新聞—是所有的新聞也要你在沒有準備的情況下,在現場直播的攝影機面前,你要作第一次,亦是唯一一次的朗讀;而且,還是要求你盡可能不會有甚麼錯誤,那你的感覺會是怎樣?

那你應該明白,做教會聚會司琴的壓力。

其實我只是想以司琴作一個例子,說明事奉的相互關係。

讓我繼續用司琴說明:

有人會說:「啊,但是你琴技高超嘛,不用預備也可以彈得很好!」

好,就算那個司琴真是奇人,那又甚麼關係?懂音樂就好像懂一種語言一樣,舉例說,你懂西班牙語,那是否等於我給你任何一本西班牙文小說,要求你立刻上台朗誦,你也沒有問題?不是的。你必定會同意,懂西班牙語,不等於懂演講;懂西班牙語,不一定可以不用預備就能藉朗誦你首次給我的西班牙文小說,而仍然可以帶領聽眾,不只聽到書裡寫的內容,而是能夠親歷其境…

不論那位奇人的琴技如何高超,可以肯定的是有預備總比沒有好。

再回到作司琴的例子:

你作領詩的,若不能預先給司琴你所準備唱的歌,有沒有想過他/她可以怎樣?就是只可以盡可能彈他可以彈到的。不錯,對你來說,可能已經很好了。但對那位司琴呢?有沒有想過他因此而要承受的壓力?有沒有想過他並不如你所感覺的「很好」?有沒有想過他因為當場要面對一首他從來沒有唱過的歌,彈不出來(或彈錯)的那種尷尬、羞愧和自責的感覺是多難受?

但你還是要顯明自己有理:「哎,我們根本沒有要求這樣完美!」

你不要求完美是你的問題,你就是沒有權要求別人不必獻上他們的最好給神!但你明白,當你明明深知自己若可以有一兩天練習,就已經可以很不同,但事情卻永不會這樣,因為別人沒有做好自己的本份,所以你就算想也沒有可能獻上叫自己滿意、無愧與神的事奉,那時你的感受是怎樣?

我給你一本聖經,你懂閱讀、也不是啞巴罷,為甚麼你不可以立刻給我們講一篇道?

你明白這是相同的荒謬嗎?

你不做好自己的,很多時候,別人就算多想做好他們的,也因為你的不能,而令至他們不能。這樣公平嗎?合理嗎?

現在讓我再回來司琴這個例子:

要是音樂奇才也是如此,可有想過我們這班平平凡凡的司琴們的壓力?

現在你明白,為甚麼在教會事奉的人會越來越少。

因為我們正要求「只有天才」先可以事奉!要面對這樣的不合理/可能的要求,就算我對彈琴略懂一二,難道我敢承擔嗎?途中還有「可以錯」的空間嗎?

你明白你的馬虎,你的last minute,如何影響別人的事奉嗎?

如此,你覺得他們的事奉感受會是怎樣?快樂嗎?還是挫敗、失望、無地自容居多?

我們事奉不是一個人的事,而是真的相互牽連;這甚至是對事奉的感受來說也是真的。

司琴只是一個例子。所有事奉也需要配答的,就算是主日學中,你的「一言堂」式教導;你不做好的準備,你的學員可以不打磕睡、發夢嗎?What if他們的新年立願正是「做個好的主日學員」?

明白嗎?

不是一個人的。

Are you willing to serve?

I was reading Tyler’s blog (codex), and come across this "O Holy Horrendous Night!" entry. I can’t deny that it is really funny while listening to that guy sings "O Holy Night", but I can’t help myself to have the following reflection…..

I was invited to help the church choir to practice a few times. On one occasion, I was even invited to conduct the choir during a hymn presentation on Sunday worship. I have absolutely no problem serving. In fact, I think it is my honor to be able to give the Lord whatever I have and be a part of the ministry that help the congregation to worship God.

But what I don’t understand is this — I am a no-body in terms of musical training. I have a grade 5 piano in HK. I took a intro course about music and music harmony when I was in U. I have no training in conducting (unless you count "observing" as training). I am surprised (and thankful) that God is willing to use such a person like me in his church.

But while I am surprised to see how God works, I am equally surprised when I know there are much more qualified brothers and sisters who should and have yet to take up that role, which is in great need right now. Of course, I don’t know their reasons (I am sure everyone must have their reasons). But I hope when they consider theirs, they can take some time to think of mine, in particular why I SHOULD NOT take that role and yet I am still willing.

1) I am just as busy as anybody else — whether you are working, home-making, studying…. my life is just as busy as yours.

2) I am just as inexperience as you think you are. As I said, I have no training in conducting. In fact, I am forcing myself to read a book on choir conducting. Worse than that, my piano skills and musical training is a lot worse than many of you.

3) As you can see, I really have no advantage over anybody. All I have is a willing heart to serve Him with all that I can offer. I know that God is looking for someone right now and that person might be you. Can you be that person? Or you would rather say that a person with grade 5 paino and nothing else makes perfect sense to serve in this position? Is this the best we can offer to our God? Is this the best YOU can offer to YOUR God?

Listening to this guy singing "O Holy Night" is essentially the same experience I have when conducting the choir. It is terrible and I know it. But it is only terrible because you are not willing to step up and produce a better "O Holy Night" yourself! So whose to blame? As I said, I have no problem continue my serving in the choir with what I have. But it is just sad (and if you ask me, ridiculous) that someone like you to give up such great opportunity to serve our Lord with what He has given you.

Think about it. 

P.S. "I am willing, what should I do?" you asked…. well, present yourself to the person in charge! Don’t sit there and wait for invitation!!